(no subject)

I'm home now from the family reunion. It was a good time, but it really flew by and I don't really feel like I had enough time to really hang out with people. Too much mingling and not enough bonding. But my second cousin Shelby has a new baby, Stella, who is adorable! I got to spend some time bonding with those two and daddy Doug, mainly because we were standing in line together for the food;) Shelby is the one who rescued me when my appendix burst and sat with me through the night at the hospital when my parents were out of town. She reassured me that though my job and the lack of liberals in the area are getting me down, she knows I'll find something soon. That makes one of us...

Well, no, not really. I've pretty much decided once and for all that I'm going to get my real estate license. I'll play at that while I get a teaching certificate, OR I'll end up being really good at it and say fuck the teaching job, this is my career. One can hope. And I think if I don't get the MBC job, my best bet in the meantime is lifeguarding, because the pay is phenomenal (comparatively speaking, anyway) and it would keep me at the pool (read: keep me in shape). Now if only I could stop saying "I'm going to do this" and just do it already. I blame my foot.

That's all I feel like talking about for now. I'm sleepy and need to lie down.

Peace.

Strange, disturbing dream.

At my aunt's house last night, there were all these Reader's Digests in my bedroom, so I picked one up and was flipping through it. I read a story by a woman who had been left widowed when her husband's plane went down in PA on 9/11. Her husband's name was Jeremy, which made it harder for me to read in a way. But I read it, and it talks about how he called her from the plane to tell her what was happening and how he was going to wrestle the attackers out of the cockpit...apparently that's what he did. Anyway, I knew it was trouble. I knew I'd have a bad dream about this.

Well.

In my dream, I'm with my mom on a vacation/tour of some sort. Our guide (who I only heard in the dream, but didn't see) was kind of narrating the events. "We're walking now to a particular historic site..." etc. Anyway, in the dream, my mom had never flown before (in real life she flies all the time) and she was very scared to fly, but we had to get on a plane for the last part of our vacation. We were touring with a group of people that we didn't really know or befriend, so we kind of stuck together. On the plane, I'm trying to calm my mom down and reassure her that everything's fine.
I remember in the dream that when we got on the plane, we took seats that were facing the back of the plane (the dream plane had seats that faced each other, much like on trains). This girl was sitting opposite us, and the whole space between the seats was filled with her shit, so that we had to sit cross-legged in our seats because there was no place for our feet. As soon as we sat down, the plane started moving, except I was actually facing the front, and I only thought I'd been facing the back. This was particularly disturbing because we boarded from outside...like we walked up to the plane, so I was pretty sure about the orientation of my seat, but I was wrong. Anyway, when most planes would be taxiing slowly out to the runway, our plane was barrelling down the little plane-road, and it was tailgating (tailfinning?) another plane. The tour guide was like, "We're going to take off now." I wasn't concerned about the reckless style of plane-driving at all. It registered that it was odd, but not dangerous or worrisome.

Then we took off. It wasn't like most takeoffs. Instead, it was like one minute we were on the ground and the next we were at our cruising altitude. Then, almost immediately, we started descending. I don't remember if I assumed we'd have to land because of a problem or if the tour guide voice said we were going to land, but I do remember telling my mom not to worry, that we would just land and take off again soon, and we were both fine with that. But no sooner were the words out of my mouth than we started a nose-dive. I remember the sensation, which is weird because I usually don't feel anything in dreams, but it was like going down a roller coaster, only knowing you're going to die at the bottom of the hill. I screamed and started to cry. I was hugging my mom, and as soon as I hugged her, the plane leveled out and slowed to a halt in midair. Then - this is the really weird part - everything outside turned to a thick, muddy consistency, and we were no longer concerned with our near death experience; we just wanted to reach out and touch some mud. Then I woke up. This whole dream lasted 45 seconds to a minute, tops, but it scared the bejeezus out of me. I woke up on the verge of peeing in my pants. So I went to the bathroom, called my husband and left him one of those "I'm so lucky to have you" messages, read a chapter of Barry Snotter, and fell back to sleep.

That was a fucked up dream, but not as fucked up as the one I had the night before, which I'm not telling ANYONE about because it was SICK.
Peace.