jianantonic: (Default)
Birthday week has been fantastic! Let's back up to last weekend. On Saturday, Toby and I went to Seaside and played a weekend of bridge. The weather was crap, but the tournament was a good time. It was Toby's first real bridge against decent competition, and we did about as well as a pair can be expected to do in such cases...45% and 41%. Sure I'm disappointed we didn't scratch on Saturday, but that wasn't really even remotely expected. On Sunday, Joe and Amy joined us for the Swiss teams. I have too many points for the team to compete in the limited games, so we were in the A/X field, which was 6 9-board rounds. Any bozo can win short rounds, but 9-board rounds are pretty tough. It's generally long enough for the better team to win, and with one complete novice on our team, the expectations were not high. But we won 3 out of the 6 matches! And all but one of our losses was a close one! All in all it was very good, and we actually tied for 2nd in X, which was worth a little more than our match awards were. So Toby has his first silver points and I'm very proud :)

On Wednesday, I had one of my biggest crowds ever at trivia -- it was standing room only at the Jolly Roger with 10 teams playing. It was awesome to have such a big crowd, and it meant I actually got some kinda decent tips.

Thursday was our birthday. Toby went to work, and Nick came over for our weekly nap, lunch, and board games. I felt like walking up to Rainy Day Games just to see if there was anything new I should buy myself for a birthday present. $100 and three games later, Nick and I came back to my place to test one of them. It's called Castles of Caladale. It's Carcassonne-ish. A little faster and lighter than that. I've only played it as a 2-player game so far, but it plays up to 4. I like it. I also picked up two new expansions for Mystic Vale. It's a newer game we've been playing with our game group, and I really like it, but it's not very well balanced. It's the kind of game where a bad bit of luck can get you irretrievably behind, and then it's just a slog until it's over. But the guys at the shop said the expansions help balance it a lot, so I'm excited to try them out. Hopefully we'll give that a go at our game night tomorrow. Toby had a work team thing after work, so we moved our birthday celebration to Friday night. I'm glad it worked out that way, because we ended up getting to do a little extra partying.

Toby made reservations at Epif, a vegan South American-inspired restaurant in NE (not that there are any vegans in South America, but the food was good!). We dressed up all fancy and took transit out there so we could get our drink on if we decided we wanted to. There was a gelato place right next to the restaurant, so naturally we went there for dessert. We decided to go back downtown to the Barrel Room, where I used to host trivia, for some drinks before heading home. It's a really fun dueling piano bar on weekends, and the show was just revving up when we arrived. We didn't really intend to stay long, but we got sucked in -- it's just such a fun atmosphere. I texted our friends Jared and Auburn, who are usually out on the town on Friday nights, and sure enough, they were nearby and were happy to join us.

For some reason last night, the bar was serving all cocktails in solo cups, so I got a nearly-full solo cup of martini. Hilarity ensued. Well, really just a lot of drunken dancing. But then at the end of the night, I made out with Auburn a little bit. I'd never kissed a girl before. Felt like the thing to do. :)

Toby and I rode the last Max home, and we did the things couples do when celebrating birthdays, followed by sleep.

I had plans to play bridge with Joe today at the club at the south waterfront at 1, but I had no intention of waking up sooner than noon. Somehow, though, both Toby and I were awake by 10, and the weather was splendid, so we decided to go for a bike ride. We rode a few miles and got breakfast, then rode to the train. We trained into Portland, and I rode another couple of miles from the Max stop to the bridge club, all along the river. It was beautiful. Joe and I had a nice game, and I reversed the ride for the way home. Lots of good exercise on a beautiful day. I've been super tired since bridge, though, and will probably fall asleep early tonight.

Also yesterday, I made it back to Weight Watchers for my first weigh-in since returning to the program a week ago. I was down almost 3 pounds! I gained a frightfully discouraging amount of weight in the clinical drug trial I was in, so I've got a long way to go before I'm happy with my body again, but it was nice to start with a good week. I hope I can keep it up! Toby and I are sticking with the 100 pushups program, too. I've repeated a few weeks along the way, but will be starting week 5 tomorrow. I can definitely see a difference in my arms. Just gotta keep on with it. Tomorrow will be a running day. After sleeping in.
jianantonic: (Seahorse)
Today is my niece Bess's 5th birthday. So much in my life and in the world has changed in 5 years; it makes it seem like Bess has always been here. But at the same time, I think, wow, my baby niece is 5!

There were things I really thought would be different about the world when you turned five. You're at the age where your memories will last you into adulthood, and I really hoped your early memories would be of growing up in a progressive era. Born under the first black president, growing up under the first female president. You wouldn't have to look hard to find great role models for anything you want to be. Instead, we've unleashed some of the worst of our country, and I'm sorry you're seeing it now. We should've been past this long before you were born; you should never have to see someone who allegedly represents you on a podium, speaking to the whole world, and saying such disgusting things. I know it doesn't really matter a lot to you now, but I'm still sad that your childhood will have this in it. I'm confident, though, that you still have plenty of places to look for your role models, and you will find the good ones.

Bess, you still have those big inquisitive eyes and long, thick eyelashes you were born with. When you are an adult, you may harness them to launch 1000 ships. Right now, they work in your favor more than you know. You do have that "look at me, I'm so sweet" pose down. You're just being silly when you do it, but one day you will learn to really harness the power. Please use it for good.

You may not like that you're still the baby, even though you're growing up. But as a 33-year-old baby, I can tell you that it's worth embracing. I love you, baby girl.
jianantonic: (Seahorse)
This is the entire text of the birthday email I got from my dad last month. He is a man of few words. I keep going back and looking at this email because it cracks me up every time. Here it is:

Dear Meg,
Hope you had a happy 33rd. I remember sitting in the operating room during Nan's caesarian. They took you out and handed you to me.
jianantonic: (Seahorse)
Yesterday was quite a lovely birthday indeed. We hiked in a place I'd never been, called Sauvie Island. I love how Portland is this big city with big city things and then you can go just a few minutes outside of downtown and suddenly you're deep in the woods. It's one of my many favorite things about living here. The hike is along the Columbia River to a lighthouse, a 7-mile round trip, which I guess I should call a walk rather than hike, because being at the river's edge, there wasn't much in the way of elevation gain. There were lots of beaches (including a nude one I didn't know existed). The concept of a river beach was foreign to me before moving out here. There might be a few sandy spots along the James or Rivanna, but they're not recreation spots at all. These were real, large sandy beaches, complete with families on beach towels and kids playing in the (bitterly cold snow-melt!!) water. We saw a sea lion frolicking, some bald eagles, and also a dead mole. One of these was less exciting than the other two.

Back home, we had a brief siesta where I had some time to Skype with Lucy and Frankie. Lucy said she just finished writing a report about Granddaddy (my dad) for a school project. I really hope I get to read it. When I asked what she wrote about, she said "EVERYTHING!" and then specified "and that time he was on a date with Nana and they were playing tennis and he split his pants!" Ha! I didn't know that story...but I'm glad it made it into her school report! People reassembled at my place at 6ish, and we played board games and ate yummy things until we were all tuckered out. Today I'm lounging in bed until something forces me up. That will probably be when Katy and her friend get here. I told her I'd spend the day with her and take her downtown. It should be fun.

I'd like to take a moment to clarify some family dynamics that I write about, which may be a little confusing. I am the baby of my family, but I have a little sister. Little sister is Emily, who is actually not a relative, but my neighbor since she was born until we went on to college. She's a year younger than I am, and we have been inseparable for our entire lives. She is a part of my family and I hers, and it feels like I'm underselling our relationship when I refer to her only as "best friend." She is my sister. We just have different parents and DNA and all that.

My husband McKenzie is an only child, but he has a little sister, too. Sort of. He has a cousin (first cousin once removed, actually, his first cousin's daughter) who has had kind of a tumultuous childhood, to say the least. My in-laws have been the only family that have really been there for her, and two years ago, they became her legal guardians. Katy is 16 now, and I really enjoy spending time with her. She's a great kid and I love her to pieces. I just try to be a safe place for her. So she's my little sister-in-law, and we're hanging out later today.

Anyway. 30. For all the time I spent thinking about it before the actual day, it hasn't really hit me yet that it's actually come to pass. Maybe there's nothing to hit me, and the big secret is that nothing changes at all. I've never put much stock in arbitrary dates on the calendar having real meaning or power, but I have always felt a little special in spite of my own philosophies on my birthdays. Yesterday was lovely, but more than any other birthday before it, it felt like just another day, even though I had special events with friends going on all day. I just expected maybe to feel something about this decade marker, but I think I've actually been feeling it since I turned 29. I've spent the last year so aware that my 20's were coming to an end that I must have numbed myself to the impact of 30 already. Or maybe there is no impact. I'm still exactly who I was on April 26th, it turns out. And thank FSM I'm not who I was when I was 25. I think my 30's are going to be great.
jianantonic: (Seahorse)
I'm not to the point yet where getting older myself is a concern, but the indirect implications are what bother me. I'm a couple hours away from 30 now, and as the baby of my family, to turn over another decade feels like the whole family gets pushed older, you know? Mom and Dad are 40+ years older than me. If I'm 30, they're 70something. My brothers are middle-aged (holy shit). Of course, all this is no more true today than it was yesterday or a few months ago, it's just a bit starker, I guess?

When I was younger, I used to be able to count on a stream of birthday cards beginning sometimes many weeks before my birthday. My grandmothers, nanny, great aunts, and other matronly caregivers in my family prided themselves on being ahead of schedule. When Virginia Page died last week, the last of my early birthday wishers moved on. There is almost no one left from my grandparents' generation; none of the family I have been closest to. No one remains in the generation above my dad on that side, and my mom has one uncle, the youngest, left from that family of seven siblings. None remain on my maternal grandfather's side. This isn't sad -- all these people would be disturbingly old if they were still around -- it just is. It sucks to say goodbye, and it sucks to miss better times, but I'm generally okay with the fact that people age and eventually die. Lots of people die before they get to age very much, so there's a bit of luck in making it this far anyway, but I guess what I'm trying to say is the thing I dislike about getting older/time passing is the increasing inevitability of the end. Not for me, but for those older than me, the ones I'm not ready to say goodbye to and start missing. I'm not terribly sentimental about birthday presents and cards and such, but this is the first year in my life when I didn't get one of those ridiculously early ones, and that struck me as a kind of subtly colossal change.

I did save the last letter Virginia Page wrote me. She knew it was the last one, and she was basically collecting her final thoughts on scrap papers, as she didn't have the energy to string too much together at once. I believe this was written on a piece of a page-a-day calendar. The front has an image of a mother hugging a child, and a quote that says "Life is the first gift, love is the second, and understanding the third." VP picked up from that on the back and wrote:

"But how difficult to understand all the time. One thing I do know, it has been a treat to have your notes and love and to watch you grow. Thanks for the gift of care and attention you've given me. Love, Virginia Page."

I'm so glad I took the time to be pen pals with her over these last few years. We're not related, but she is a true Massie family treasure, and I'm going to miss her like crazy. I'm glad, too, that she got to see me grow, twice as old as my grandmother witnessed. It was so special to me each time VP mentioned that I reminded her of Margaret (my grandmother and her best friend). There is no higher compliment, and I'm glad that 15 years past Marma's departure, those closest to her still find me living by her example. (She didn't say "fuck" as much, but she did teach me the "beans, beans, they're good for your heart..." rhyme. Scandalous enough for a Southern lady born in 1908.)

In so many ways, a person never outgrows being the baby of the family, but the next generation is filling in quite nicely, and I'm enjoying something of a position of wisdom and authority with my nieces and younger cousins. In fact, nothing has been more rewarding to me than playing the role of aunt. And I'm getting much better at it with each passing year. Aging is a mixed bag, I guess, but I'm still in the upswing, and I'm optimistic that I can continue to find examples of upswinging as I get older still. I'm not ready to think about everything that will come with being 40, but one thing I know will be awesome is that Lucy will be a young adult. I will take her on a trip for her high school graduation, and we'll share amazing life experiences when she's older that a 9-year-old can't really appreciate. I don't need to press fast forward, but I know that time in her life is going to be special for me as her aunt, and I welcome it. Emily will probably have a kid or two by then as well, and I'll be their aunt, too. And that's just fucking awesome.

So, hello there, 30. 
jianantonic: (Seahorse)
I'm a couple weeks behind schedule here, and I'm very sorry about that, but since you probably won't read this until years down the road if ever at all, I'm going to give myself a pass on the lateness. Apologies, though.

Happy ninth birthday, Lucy! This year has been my favorite year of being your aunt, because I got to spend more time with you than I ever really had before, and I got to witness some things that made me so proud of the young person you are. I happened to be in New York the week that you hosted your 8th birthday party, and you invited me to come along and help your parents. I was delighted to be included, and enjoyed playing and celebrating with you. That year, you told your friends not to bring presents, but instead to bring books that you would donate. You have done things like this before, as well, asking for donations for the less fortunate instead of toys and gifts. I am SO PROUD of you for this. I'm almost 30 and I still love birthday presents and get excited about them. When I was in elementary school, if you'd suggested that I sacrifice birthday presents, I would not have taken that well. I love what a generous heart you have. That also makes you a wonderful big sister.

You are so good with Frankie and Bess, and they are so lucky to have you. You and Frankie fight sometimes, but that's pretty normal, and most of the time you love each other to bits. One time when I was visiting last year, the two of you were fighting over a dressup outfit that you both wanted to wear. Rachel was busy breastfeeding Bess, and William wasn't home, so it was up to me to be the adult in the situation. I've never been the position of authority between a children's screaming match, and I was honestly shaking in my boots a little as I walked to deal with you two. It wasn't so bad, though. I just reminded you that time is a thing that exists on a continuum, and if one of you wears the tutu now, the other one can wear it later, and everyone settled down. But it made me tense and worried to have been in the middle of your fight, and so when I heard Frankie scream a few minutes later, I was really concerned there was another storm brewing. I ran over to see what had happened, and you had accidentally knocked her over. You helped her up and gave her a hug and said you were sorry. I braced for her to lash out, but instead she just sniffed, "That's okay Lucy, but it did really hurt." I can't really explain just how precious that interaction was, but it demonstrated the way you guys care about each other so much. A lot of kids your age are too proud to apologize or admit accidents, and might just yell back at their kid siblings in such a situation. But you deescalated what I was afraid was going to get very ugly, and it actually turned out to be one of the sweetest moments I've seen. It may not seem like a big deal, but to me, it spoke volumes about your character, and your love for your sister.

During that visit last spring, William arranged for me to spend the day with you, just the two of us, which we'd never done before. You needed more clothes for your Brooklyn collection, and I was super happy to take you shopping. I couldn't help myself -- I bought you everything you wanted and then some. You totally roped me in by complimenting my taste. When you said the things I was picking out for you were cool, I would have bought you the whole freaking store. Don't get used to that, though...I really can't afford it. Still, going broke on that shopping trip with you was the best part of my visit. We also went to see "The Lorax" together, just you and me. What a great movie! I loved it, and I'm glad you loved it, too. We walked home singing the song from the end credits together. "Let it grow...let it grow..." I still listen to that song frequently and I always think of you when I hear it.

We got to hang out some more over the summer on our family vacation in Williamsburg. We spent lots of time together at the theme parks, riding roller coasters and water slides. You are by far the most daring one in the family! You had to talk Uncle A and me into joining you on some of the more insane water slides, but even though I was kind of terrified, I couldn't skip out on the opportunity to share these experiences with you. Your smile was so big! I loved being part of your great time. My favorite memory from that trip was the night we went to Busch Gardens to see the fireworks show. We were riding the swings when they started, and you and Frankie both lit up with amazement as we twirled around in the air and fireworks burst above us. It was one of those moments that just feels completely perfect, and sharing that with you and the rest of our family was so great. I may have cried a little.

You're getting really into history lately. You told me you love all the presidents. I asked if that included George W. Bush. "Oh, well, no, not him." Atta girl. You read a lot and love to play games and perform for others. You have a beautifully creative mind, and you have entertained me a lot over the years.

I was sharing some of our family history with you, and when I told you that your great-grandfather was one of 15 kids, you said that you wanted to be one of 15. I don't think your parents are on board for that, but you said if they won't have 12 more kids, then I should have them so you could have 12 cousins. You said I'd be a great mom. I may have cried again. I don't really plan to do the mom thing, but I love being an aunt so much, and I'm so honored that you think I'd make a good mom. If anyone could talk me into it, it's you, but please don't...

I don't have as many photos of you online as I would like, but I have your school picture and a picture of us on Apollo's Chariot with Uncle A pinned to the wall in my office, along with a picture you drew for me. I look at you and smile several times a day. I love you!
jianantonic: (Seahorse)
It's so cliche to say this, but I'll say it anyway because it's true -- I can't believe how fast you are growing up! Francesca Leslie Massie, you are FIVE years old today! I was there when you were five HOURS old! And it doesn't seem like it was that long ago!

Here I am holding you for the first time, in Rachel's recovery room at the hospital where you were born. You were so teeny tiny! Look how my hand is so much bigger than your head in this picture! I love that Facebook has become so popular and user-friendly since you were born. I have photos of you from every birthday, and can watch the history of your childhood as I flip through pictures online in a matter of minutes. I don't know if you'll ever really be able to wrap your head around what a big development that is for folks in my generation. But this is about you, not the history of photography...anyway, what I'm saying is I'm really glad I have all these moments in pictures, because you have grown up a lot and you've done so many cute, adorable, and awesome things, the memories would be fuzzier without all these pictures. Here's another really precious one that I hope will be special to you one day:

That's William holding Lucy up to the nursery window in the hospital so she could get her first glimpse of her baby sister. Look how excited she is! I've loved watching your relationship with Lucy develop. You girls are very different, but definitely both Massie girls! You sometimes butt heads like all siblings do, but you love each other so much. I wasn't there when Bess was born, but I imagine your reaction was similar to this. I know you have really enjoyed getting to be a big sister, too. You're very proud of that role, and I'm very proud of how you relate to your family. I'm proud to be a part of your family.

You are the most loving person I know (and anyone who knows my in-laws knows that this is major statement!). Your sweetness and affection has a lot to do with why I love being an aunt so much. I have always loved it, of course, but it took a while for me to figure out how I would define the role of aunt. I don't have much experience with younger kids, and I didn't really know how to be a good aunt. Sometimes it was hard to tell if Lucy liked me at all. I just didn't know how to entertain little girls. But you were very different. As soon as you could talk, you were very affectionate, and always willing to play with me. You made aunting easy! You were outgoing and friendly and would tell me what you wanted. When you were very little, I taught you how to waddle -- just a funny walk that I made up while watching you play on the beach in Easthampton. You thought it was hilarious, and would copy me and shout "waddle waddle waddle!" and laugh hysterically. Do you have any idea how rewarding it is to make a kid laugh? I have always loved to make you laugh, and I especially love how easy it is! You really enjoy my silly side, which is lucky for me because I'm a very silly person. Being able to make you smile and laugh really took the whole aunt thing to a new level for me.

I live far away and don't get to visit as often as I would like, and I know when little kids don't see someone for a while, it's easy to just kind of forget about them. With most of the kids in the family, it takes a little while to get comfortable when we're visiting for the first time in a while. It's not a bad thing, just a fact -- when you haven't seen someone in a long time, it's not easy to be best buddies right away. Sometimes you need to catch up and reacquaint yourselves. But you've never been this way with me. I remember coming to New York for your 2nd birthday, and I hadn't seen you in about seven months -- surely you were too young then to remember me. I'm sure your parents coached you a little bit before I came, but you knew my name as soon as you saw me, and you gave me a hug and a kiss right away. Now that you're older, I don't worry about you forgetting me between visits, but it still amazes me how affectionate you always are right from the start. One of my all-time favorite memories is from when I was just passing through New York. I just had time to stop by for the afternoon and have dinner before I had to leave again. Your mom told you I was coming to visit that day, and when you heard the elevator, you ran out of your apartment and greeted me immediately. "Aunt Meg!" you yelled, "I love you!" I'll never forget that :)

Since you guys got the 7F apartment, I've been able to visit and stay with you a few more times. Whenever I sleep there, you crawl into bed with me in the morning to wake me up, and you just cuddle with me until we decide it's time to get up. The thing about being an aunt is that I want to hug my nieces all the time, but you guys probably would rather play than just spend all day in a big hug. I get it and that doesn't hurt my feelings at all. But I really appreciate how much time you do spend on hugs.

Over the past couple of years, I've been able to share my seahorse obsession with you. I gave you the stuffed seahorse that you named Francesca Meg Massie, and I'm so honored that she is one of your favorites. You know I love seahorses a lot, and so it's fun for me that you like them so much, too. It's like our thing. I love that we have a thing together, even if I kind of forced it on you.

One of my favorite things that you do right now (besides give me hugs) is sing pop songs. My brother has coached you to sing some particularly hilarious lines from the music of our day...you used to say "No, no, no" the way Amy Winehouse sings it in "Rehab," and your latest thing is the following bit of dialogue:
Hey Frankie, what's on your mind?
"I got my mind on my money and my money on my mind."
How much money do you have?
You also sing "Call Me Maybe," with your own version of the lyrics -- "Hey, I just met you, and this is gravy, but here's my mother, so call me maybe." You rock, kiddo. I'm excited to see what you'll learn this year, and what memories I will have to add for your sixth birthday. Thanks for all the laughs and smiles you give me. I love you!
jianantonic: (Default)
I am full of ideas today.  Here's one I want all my friends in on.

I turn 30 exactly 8 months from today.  I don't really have a before-I'm-30 to-do list, but eight months out is kind of the perfect amount of time for me to gear up and train for a half marathon.  So I'm making that my one-item checklist for the end of my 20's.  I looked for races near here around that time, and there are none that work for me, but then I got to thinking, I could make a destination birthday party out of it.  Many of my friends are runners who are happy to travel, and my friends who are not runners would certainly be welcome for the trip as well, on the condition that you stand somewhere along the course and cheer for me and tell me how awesome I am when I finish, and more than likely feel like shit.  30-year-old shit.

So I looked at some race calendars and specifically searched for flat half marathons in temperate climates, and I've narrowed it down to either Nashville on my actual birthday (April 27) or Santa Cruz a few weeks prior.  I'm actually leaning toward Santa Cruz, 'cause it's easier for me to get to, and it's BEFORE Gatlinburg, which will surely be a difficult time for me to keep up with my training.  Also it's on the motherfucking ocean.  Seems like a winner to me.  A very nice number of my friends have already chimed in that they're interested, and I want to reiterate that participation in the race is not a mandatory part of this celebration.  If enough people commit, I think we should rent a house on the beach for the weekend and make a whole thing of it.  So if you want to be a part of it, I hope you will be.  Consider this an open invitation.  I'm pretty sure all the people I dislike also dislike me, so I'm not at all worried about some a-hole crashing my party when I really don't want them to.  So, yes, YOU.  You are invited.  I hope you'll consider it :)  I'm turning 30 motherfucking years old.  And you know what?  I'm going to be in better shape than I was at 20.  Maybe when I'm 40 we'll do a marathon.  
jianantonic: (Default)
If I were on the east coast, I'd be 28 by now.  A bunch of my friends in Virginia have already sent their wishes, which makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.  I don't think birthdays are a big deal, really, and I certainly don't want anyone to bend over backwards or spend money on mine, but I do really love them.  

Gail and I watched Swedish Auto tonight, an indie drama that was filmed in Charlottesville in 2006.  One review called it "heartwarming."  I would say that's more than a little misleading.  It was pretty dark, but it was cool to recognize all the places in the film.  The main character's apartment was right next to the building where I used to work.

I'm really looking forward to turning my apartment into a more grown up living space. We went to Ikea today to pick up a few small things that I wanted to get on the cheap (trash cans, vases for the origami flowers I'm going to decorate with, and a couple more chairs so I can host a proper bridge game here), and I spent a lot of time mentally decorating.  Right now, our furniture is a hodgepodge of secondhand items from Z's family or from Goodwill, and while none of it is bad, none of it is great (except our bed, which rocks), and none of it matches, so it still feels kind of like a college apartment.  And when I hang out with my friends at their places, they just feel so much more grown up, and I'd really like my house to feel that way, too.  In my own quirky way, of course.  So little by little, I'd like to replace our furnishings and housewares with nicer things.  I'm pretty confident that we'll stay in this apartment for a long time, so it feels safe to start making that kind of investment.  But I'm in no hurry...this is just sort of floating around in my head for now.
Birthday festivities tomorrow will be low-key but awesome.  My friend Linda is hosting a small gathering of friends for dinner and bridge at her house on the river, so even though the forecast looks shitty, I'm hoping the sun will peek through enough for Mt. Hood to make an appearance.  They have the BEST view. 
So, 28.  It doesn't feel remarkable, really.  Still a comfortable distance away from my 30's, though I can't say I'm dreading that milestone.  Who knows how I'll feel about it in a year or two.  I don't feel like there's any great wisdom that separates 28 from 27.  It's more or less the same.  But 27 was undoubtedly the worst year of my life.  A case could be made, though, that it was also the best.  I hit my lowest low, but that was what got me to turn my shit around.  I'm still working on that, and I still have bad habits to shed and obstacles to maneuver, but I'm doing well.  And there was never the possibility for my life to be as good as it is now without the perspective I gained while losing my mind.  I'm starting my 29th year in a really good place.   I came a long way as a 27-year-old, but I'm happy for the symbolic reboot that comes with a birthday.  Bring it.


jianantonic: (Default)

September 2017

3456 789


RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Sep. 26th, 2017 07:23 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios