To Stuart

Jul. 8th, 2016 10:49 am
jianantonic: (Seahorse)
[personal profile] jianantonic
My friend Stuart passed away this morning. He had been diagnosed with an incurable lung cancer about 3 years ago. Not unexpected, not any less heartbreaking.

I met Stuart at Long Hill Farm at my very first Falcon Ridge -- his first, too. 2003. He was new to the camp but he took to it like he'd been there forever, and he and Janice were a big part of making me feel at home there. My first FRFF was a huge turning point for me -- coming from conservative Harrisonburg, right on the heels of the outbreak of the Iraq war, I just had no idea there could be so much love in one place. Stuart looms large in all of my earliest Falcon Ridge memories.

I was 20 years old then, the youngest in camp that year (Stuart's young daughter, Olivia, would join us the following year). Everyone in what was not yet known as Shantytowne was a role model to me, whether they realized it or not. I had found my people, for the first time.

I would see Stuart and Janice not just at Falcon Ridge each year, but also on my many treks to Northern Virginia to catch a show. I stayed at their house a number of times. They were at my wedding to Jeremy, and later presented us with a DVD of Girlyman's performance at our reception -- what a gift! Olivia grew up as our Shantytowne little sister. I believe she's 22 now -- an amazing young woman, who will always be part excited, shy, adorable 10-year-old to so many of us. Last year at the festival, she and Stuart performed a set together at our Shanty stage. I've been moved by a lot of musical performances, but nothing ever touched me as much as that one.

When I hugged Stuart goodbye at the end of the festival, I was afraid it may be the last time I'd see him. He and Janice had already said it would be their last Falcon Ridge. He was requiring a lot of medical support by then, and camping for a long weekend was just not realistic. I told him I loved him, and I was so glad he was there. I told Janice I loved her. We cried together. And then we went along.

I'm so looking forward to Falcon Ridge next month. Of course I look forward to it every year...those people are my family. This is the first member of that family that we have lost. And I look forward to honoring our friend, as I'm sure we constantly will. I wish Toby could have met him. Stuart loved all things Scotland. They would have bonded for sure.

As Janice said, "In our hearts, you no longer struggle to breathe. 'Good night, sweet prince:/and flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.'"

Date: 2016-07-08 06:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jkpolk.livejournal.com
It's interesting. I too was thinking earlier about him being the first of us we've lost. And then I felt guilty because my ex Paul died years ago and he came with me several years. But I guess in my heart I don't include him in Shantytowne, because that would just dull the towne's shine with bad memories.

Date: 2016-07-08 06:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jianantonic.livejournal.com
Yeah, that's true. Paul is a complicated case. Stuart, not at all complicated.

Date: 2016-07-09 02:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] acousticel.livejournal.com
I'm so sorry, Meg. Sending you healing wishes of peace and love.

Date: 2016-07-09 05:36 am (UTC)

Date: 2016-07-09 03:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] deepseasiren.livejournal.com
I'm sorry, Meg * SENDS BIG HUGS*

Date: 2016-07-11 06:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kixeldorado.livejournal.com

I'm sorry you lost your friend. This was a very nice tribute - you have lots of good things to remember him by.

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Meg

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