(no subject)

[jianantonic]

Don't you hate it when you really like someone (like a celebrity, not a friend) and then you find out something about them that just makes you want to cry? When I was a kid, I knew about drugs, but I thought only hugely fucked up people did them - I didn't realize how everywhere they were, and it honestly never even crossed my mind that rock stars were junkies. When that Tom Petty song came out ("You don't know how it feels") and he sings "Let's get to the point / let's roll another joint," I thought he was just talking about going to a different club or something.

Well, I've come to terms with that. I now look at the drug issue as a personal choice thing. I prefer clean friends, but as long as people aren't hurting others in the quest for the perfect high, I'm okay with them. And, being the hippie that I am, a good chunk of my friends have ridden the magic carpet a time or two. (I just pulled that out of my ass...I don't even know if that's actually a euphemism for doing drugs...but that's how I mean it. I put this disclaimer here just in case riding the magic carpet is a euphemism for something really bad or freaky like going on a shooting spree while getting head from two children or something.) Anyway.

But there are some things I just can't get past. I don't want to mention them specifically because I don't want anyone to think I'm coming down on them, but lately I've been finding out a lot of things about people I really liked that makes me not like them anymore. Mostly I mean celebrities. One example I can use is that I really liked Lindsay Lohan (I know, I know), but then I found out that she was all buddy buddy with Paris Hilton and now I'm like, eh....
And let's just say it's a good thing I've never seen Steve Finley with a wad of chew in his cheek. Then it would be all over.

So there's stuff like that, but then there's another way your whole perspective can change about a person. This way is what some people call diarrhea of the mouth. It's when people just say whatever is on their mind without thinking, and you realize that the thoughts in their head are sooooo not cool. Example:
12th grade, Greek class.
Katie loves Shane Battier. Katie holds Shane Battier picture close to her heart.
Brian says: You know you could never actually marry Shane Battier.
Katie: I know, cause I don't even know him and he's famous and older and all that.
Brian: No, because he's black.

?!?!?!?!

See, and I'll never respect Brian ever again. Not that I've talked to him since 12th grade anyway but you know. He could come back to our high school reunion with a Nobel Prize, and I'll still think, "Oh, that's nice you racist asshole."

Just saying.

Peace.

Comments

[flamingophoenix.livejournal.com]

Wow. That's like a bad joke, except it sounds like he was being serious. Not knowing Brian all that well, I'd say there's a chance he was just being an asshole when he said that, and not meaning it...but that's a fine line, and it only works when people know you well enough to know your real feelings.

Or is that even true? Does it matter what your real feelings are, if you constantly say horrible things?

Eric, I'd like to hear your response to this...

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

He meant it. Brian is a racist elitist and I always sort of knew that about him.

[pwylltwiceborn.livejournal.com]

Fuck yes, what you think matters.

The reason I say terrible things in front of my friends is because my friends know I actually wouldn't do a thirteen year old (and not because I'm superstitious). Because they know that things like melanin count and whose/which orifices people prefer don't affect my opinions of people.

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

What you say in trusted company versus what you say in general makes a difference, too. Kind of along those lines, I HATE it when people say "that's gay," because whether or not they think it is actually homosexual, they are promoting the use of that term as an insult. The more society as a whole is okay with negative statements like this (or joking statements about race), the more the undertones are perpetuated. I think it can do far more damage than good.

[pwylltwiceborn.livejournal.com]

Sure. But the more people are afraid to discuss their own feelings, the more asinine things just get conveyed within families. I favor open, honest discussion of feelings pertaining to all such things, rather than fear of one's opinions getting one in real trouble.

Maybe it's the racially-integrated way I grew up, or just the weirdness that's my home community, but jokes like "I don't dance because I'm white" are fine by me. I know--I'm white. I can't dance. The correlation is high--causation, who knows?

Honest opinions about racial matters have gotten me in trouble before. But if nobody says things like "the NAACP is racist," (not that I disagree with the mission of the NAACP) then what's going to promote open honest dialogue?

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

Open honest dialogue is fine. Racist/homophobic jokes are a problem for me. Some open honest dialogue becomes diarrhea of the mouth. I guess it's a fine line.

[flamingophoenix.livejournal.com]

What about racist jokes that everyone in the room acknowledges are horrible?

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

I have mixed feelings about them. Yes, they're funny sometimes...but when you tell jokes like that, you're focusing on stereotypes and negative points, and that's bad.

What do you call a black pilot?

A pilot, you fucking racist.

[harri-cady.livejournal.com]

I hate that and the loose use of the word "retarded." Both "slang" uses are highly offensive.

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

I agree.

[flamingophoenix.livejournal.com]

Yes. I don't ever say things are "gay," but I have been known to say things are "retarded." And I hate it. (I think the last time was middle school, but still.) Augh.

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

Remember when we used to come down on ourselves (we had a routine, even) when we said "hate?" We were so cool/dorky.

[harri-cady.livejournal.com]

Diarrhea of the mouth is a good expression for that. Ugh.

[pwylltwiceborn.livejournal.com]

Diarrhea of the mouth is (most unfortunately) often accompanied by constipation of the brain.

[harri-cady.livejournal.com]

Sure seems like it in this case.

Foot-in-mouth syndrome is the one where the brain isn't necessarily affected, right?

:)