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Jan. 4th, 2015 10:24 amI have been having a really rough time emotionally lately. Things in my life are mostly pretty good, but my ability to deal with conflict and difficulty is just not there right now, and it makes me feel hopeless a lot of the time. I went out with a group of people last night -- a mix of folks I know, sort of know, and don't know at all -- and had a really nice time. I had a drink, immersed myself in the event, and let the other concerns out of my head for an hour. It was a really nice hour. I wish I could've stayed longer, but I had other things to do.
Despite how miserable and low I've felt lately, I am taking care of myself. I tried a GRITplyo class for the first time at my gym yesterday -- that was sort of an accident. I went for BodyPump, but they'd changed the schedule on me. Pump was condensed from 60 minutes to 30, and the second half of the hour was GRIT. I kind of want to try GRITstrength, but I never intended to do the plyo class because plyo is hard and I hate it and it hurts. But a kind of magical thing happened. The class was so fucking painful and hard and awful that for those 30 minutes, I could think of nothing else but how much I hated being there. I know that sounds delightful and all, but it was totally a release from everything else that's been weighing on my mind lately. Maybe I can make myself keep going back. Big maybe. But...I do see the benefits.
Today I'm going on a hike with a friend who was traveling around Europe for a month, and then got back when I was out of town for most of December, so I haven't seen him for two months. It'll be good to catch up, but I'm a little concerned that I'm going to wordvomit all about the problems I've been having lately and totally ambush him with my personal crises. Will try to avoid that.
Z is flying home today for a very quick visit. We've both been so incredibly wrecked lately -- his boss and good friend died suddenly on Monday, and he is reeling from that. He decided we needed to hold each other and he is flying back for a day between assignments to make that happen. I'm really glad he's coming. I think I need it more than I realized before he told me he was. I think it will help us both a little.
Despite how miserable and low I've felt lately, I am taking care of myself. I tried a GRITplyo class for the first time at my gym yesterday -- that was sort of an accident. I went for BodyPump, but they'd changed the schedule on me. Pump was condensed from 60 minutes to 30, and the second half of the hour was GRIT. I kind of want to try GRITstrength, but I never intended to do the plyo class because plyo is hard and I hate it and it hurts. But a kind of magical thing happened. The class was so fucking painful and hard and awful that for those 30 minutes, I could think of nothing else but how much I hated being there. I know that sounds delightful and all, but it was totally a release from everything else that's been weighing on my mind lately. Maybe I can make myself keep going back. Big maybe. But...I do see the benefits.
Today I'm going on a hike with a friend who was traveling around Europe for a month, and then got back when I was out of town for most of December, so I haven't seen him for two months. It'll be good to catch up, but I'm a little concerned that I'm going to wordvomit all about the problems I've been having lately and totally ambush him with my personal crises. Will try to avoid that.
Z is flying home today for a very quick visit. We've both been so incredibly wrecked lately -- his boss and good friend died suddenly on Monday, and he is reeling from that. He decided we needed to hold each other and he is flying back for a day between assignments to make that happen. I'm really glad he's coming. I think I need it more than I realized before he told me he was. I think it will help us both a little.
