Conspiracy Against Sleep
Mar. 12th, 2007 08:22 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jianantonicThis is going to sound like a bitter, angry post, and it is, but you can breathe easy knowing that I'm not actually bitter or angry at this very moment. It's just something I wanted to blog about even though the feeling has passed.
I am starting to believe there is a conspiracy against my sleep. I'm not even going to mention Daylight Savings Time, because I actually quite like that it's lighter later and all that, and I'm not the only one who lost an hour this weekend. So let's start with last night. I had been asleep for about an hour when the phone that I keep on and next to me in bed (2 reasons: Ahren's schedule is wonky and if he can only call me at 2am, then I want to take that call, and my phone is also my alarm clock) rings. I answer it, thinking it must be Ahren, because he's the only person who would possibly dare call me in the middle of the night like that. But I think I was still pretty much talking in my sleep when I answered the phone, because I do not remember a lick of what the person on the other end said. In fact, I do remember not understanding her at all at the time, but without even bothering to try and decipher what she was saying, I told her she had the wrong number, because obviously she did. She said she was sorry and hung up.
Two minutes pass. The phone rings again. Same woman. I answer and said "You are still dialing the same number, and it is still wrong." She started to say something but I hung up.
Ten minutes pass. I fall asleep again, and just as I'm starting to sink back into that happy place, the phone rings AGAIN. Same woman. I answer: "It's the middle of the fucking night - STOP CALLING ME!" and hang up.
Ten minutes pass. I fall asleep again, and just as I'm starting to sink back into that happy place, the phone rings AGAIN. Same woman. I answer: "WHAT?!"
Woman: Stop hanging up on me. Listen, I'm sorry to keep waking you, but I'm trying to reach my daughter and this is the number I have for her. Please just tell me if this is the right number.
Me: Obviously it isn't. If you are sorry to keep waking me, why do you wait long enough for me to fall asleep between calls? It's the middle of the night and I have to get up at the crack of dawn for work. MY mother knows this and wouldn't call at this hour. As I am the only person at this number, I can assure you that I am not your daughter and you will not find her by dialing me over and over again.
Woman: Please, just tell me, is your number (reads my number)?
Me: Yes, MY number is the one that you keep dialing. This has been MY number FOR A LONG TIME. This is where I hang up.
The woman kept talking but I didn't listen. I hung up.
Look, maybe she had an emergency (though she didn't sound like she did; she just acted rude and mad at me like I was keeping her from her daughter on purpose) and had to reach her daughter, but if a wrong phone number is the only way you have to contact her, then I can't imagine any emergency situation where you actually need to commune in the middle of the night. I know I usually go to bed early so the term "middle of the night" is relative, but these calls were between midnight and 1am. And she was rude to me. Which is why I love caller ID. Because I can warn my friends that if you ever get a call from 615-430-3751, it will be a stupid, persistent bitch, who is persistent in her bitchiness, on the other end. Again that was 615-430-3751.
Secondly, one of my new neighbors is one of those people who either forgets to turn off their alarm when they're not home, or just sleeps through it all morning, because every day for the past week, that fucking alarm has started going off at the crack of dawn and is still beeping when I leave for work (or wherever I go) decidedly later than the crack of dawn. I don't know how to tactfully handle this, as I want to like my neighbors and I want them to like me, but I haven't met them yet and I am filled with rage every time that fucking alarm wakes me up and keeps me up an hour earlier than I need to be awake.
Thirdly, and this is my biggest gripe - I don't have my warm and cuddly here. "Warm and cuddly" is a term I picked up from a friend, who jokingly uses this phrase to describe the person you sleep next to at night. Though Ahren's feet are usually about as warm as a penguin's, and he's got less body fat than your average Nigerian, he's still my warm and cuddly and I sleep a heck of a lot better when he's here. One week to go. Seven more sleeps. Or seven more nights of non-sleep. Something like that.
I'll write more later - an entry about bridge and maybe another about things I'm actually happy about today.
Peace.
I am starting to believe there is a conspiracy against my sleep. I'm not even going to mention Daylight Savings Time, because I actually quite like that it's lighter later and all that, and I'm not the only one who lost an hour this weekend. So let's start with last night. I had been asleep for about an hour when the phone that I keep on and next to me in bed (2 reasons: Ahren's schedule is wonky and if he can only call me at 2am, then I want to take that call, and my phone is also my alarm clock) rings. I answer it, thinking it must be Ahren, because he's the only person who would possibly dare call me in the middle of the night like that. But I think I was still pretty much talking in my sleep when I answered the phone, because I do not remember a lick of what the person on the other end said. In fact, I do remember not understanding her at all at the time, but without even bothering to try and decipher what she was saying, I told her she had the wrong number, because obviously she did. She said she was sorry and hung up.
Two minutes pass. The phone rings again. Same woman. I answer and said "You are still dialing the same number, and it is still wrong." She started to say something but I hung up.
Ten minutes pass. I fall asleep again, and just as I'm starting to sink back into that happy place, the phone rings AGAIN. Same woman. I answer: "It's the middle of the fucking night - STOP CALLING ME!" and hang up.
Ten minutes pass. I fall asleep again, and just as I'm starting to sink back into that happy place, the phone rings AGAIN. Same woman. I answer: "WHAT?!"
Woman: Stop hanging up on me. Listen, I'm sorry to keep waking you, but I'm trying to reach my daughter and this is the number I have for her. Please just tell me if this is the right number.
Me: Obviously it isn't. If you are sorry to keep waking me, why do you wait long enough for me to fall asleep between calls? It's the middle of the night and I have to get up at the crack of dawn for work. MY mother knows this and wouldn't call at this hour. As I am the only person at this number, I can assure you that I am not your daughter and you will not find her by dialing me over and over again.
Woman: Please, just tell me, is your number (reads my number)?
Me: Yes, MY number is the one that you keep dialing. This has been MY number FOR A LONG TIME. This is where I hang up.
The woman kept talking but I didn't listen. I hung up.
Look, maybe she had an emergency (though she didn't sound like she did; she just acted rude and mad at me like I was keeping her from her daughter on purpose) and had to reach her daughter, but if a wrong phone number is the only way you have to contact her, then I can't imagine any emergency situation where you actually need to commune in the middle of the night. I know I usually go to bed early so the term "middle of the night" is relative, but these calls were between midnight and 1am. And she was rude to me. Which is why I love caller ID. Because I can warn my friends that if you ever get a call from 615-430-3751, it will be a stupid, persistent bitch, who is persistent in her bitchiness, on the other end. Again that was 615-430-3751.
Secondly, one of my new neighbors is one of those people who either forgets to turn off their alarm when they're not home, or just sleeps through it all morning, because every day for the past week, that fucking alarm has started going off at the crack of dawn and is still beeping when I leave for work (or wherever I go) decidedly later than the crack of dawn. I don't know how to tactfully handle this, as I want to like my neighbors and I want them to like me, but I haven't met them yet and I am filled with rage every time that fucking alarm wakes me up and keeps me up an hour earlier than I need to be awake.
Thirdly, and this is my biggest gripe - I don't have my warm and cuddly here. "Warm and cuddly" is a term I picked up from a friend, who jokingly uses this phrase to describe the person you sleep next to at night. Though Ahren's feet are usually about as warm as a penguin's, and he's got less body fat than your average Nigerian, he's still my warm and cuddly and I sleep a heck of a lot better when he's here. One week to go. Seven more sleeps. Or seven more nights of non-sleep. Something like that.
I'll write more later - an entry about bridge and maybe another about things I'm actually happy about today.
Peace.
