(no subject)

[jianantonic]

We made it to Vegas this afternoon, but not without travel difficulties, as usual.  I didn't get sick this time, but I think I would have preferred an upset stomach to the cramps I had for the first four hours of the flight today.  Four hours of pain is not much in the grand scheme of things, but it was one of those things where I was SO uncomfortable that I think I would've been relieved to hear the plane was crashing and we were all going to die.  I finally asked the flight attendant for some painkillers, which really helped when I was able to take them.  It took a while to work up to it because I felt like trying to take a pill or drink water would just make things worse. 

Aside from the fact that I knew it was time for my period to come by the calendar, neither McKenzie or I saw this one coming.  Usually I have pretty bad pain and nausea in the days leading up, and McKenzie has noticed that I've had a pretty wretched temper when I'm PMSing, but there was absolutely none of that this time around.  I guess that's nice, but why the horrid cramps, then, huh?  I'd like to go one month without PMS or cramps.  That would be a nice change. 

We don't want kids.  I know I'm not even 25 yet, so I haven't even been introduced to my biological clock, but I'm really tempted to just get a hysterectomy and be done with it.  I know there would be lots of other serious considerations like hormones and elevated cancer risks in addition to what if I change my mind about babies, but it's getting to the point where I either have unbearable physical or emotional pain or both every month, and holy fuck if I can get rid of that with a surgery, then let's cut me up already.  But I'm not going to be hasty about it.  25 days of the month, I don't even think about it.  The other five days wouldn't be so terrible, if only I didn't have to spend them on airplanes or wearing pantyhose because it's formal night at the bridge tournament or you know, being human.  Meh.

Anyway, Vegas is nice.  At least, the weather is beautiful.  It's been 10 or 12 years since I've been here last, and it's cleaner than I remember.  I was just a kid then, so I didn't go inside any casinos, so I can't say what's changed about those.  I played a bit today at the Circus Circus casino, which is nice because there are $1 and $3 blackjack tables, but the blackjacks only pay 6 to 5 and you don't get comps unless you're at the $10 tables or higher.  There were no seats at the cheap tables when I was there, so I played $5 tables for a while and did alright.  I started off on a losing streak, but then worked my way back up to even and left.  I stuck $1 in a nickel slot and played all my credits without winning anything until the very last one.  I won fifteen free spins on my final credit and won $15 with that, then left and went to a different blackjack table.  I left the table up $56 for +$71 total in about an hour of gambling.  I haven't decided yet if I'll go back to the casino tonight or try to play bridge instead.  I really like casinos.  I'm okay with not living near one, though.  But if I could play with someone else's money all day, I totally would.  Since it's my own, though...discipline is key.  It's time to go meet Z's client.  If I don't update for the rest of the week, it's because I'm not winning anything;)

Peace.

Comments

[pee-truck.livejournal.com]

Why not get Depo shots? Then you don't have a period at all to worry about.

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

It's been a while since health class, but I think most women do still get periods with those shots, or at least occasional spotting, and I'd heard they were a cancer risk. But it's something to ask my doctor about, I guess.

[flamingophoenix.livejournal.com]

DEFINITELY something to talk to your doctor about.

I get all my friends' uteruses (uteri?) mixed up, but are you one of the people who tried birth control and it just made things worse for them? I can't remember. :-( But birth control fucking changed my life. (How's THAT for a dangling modifier??) From a couple of days of intense pain and depression every month...to not having that. Amazing.

Anyway, like I said, talk to your doctor (not like ANY legit doctor would be all "Okay, let's cut you open!" without EXHAUSTIVELY discussing EVER other option, but still...) because s/he is the medical professional, and will know way more than I do about chemicals and hormones and risk/benefit analysis and shit.

But good luck with all that, anyway. You shouldn't have to put up with this crap.

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

I was on birth control for 8 years, and I've been off it for a while now. I really don't want to go back on it. Really. I was on three different Rxes over that time span, and the ones that cured my cramps made me puke all the time, and the ones that actually did anything for my period did awful things to my metabolism. I don't want to have to use drugs to feel normal....

[flamingophoenix.livejournal.com]

May I channel Carolyn for a moment?

Would the sentence "I don't want to have to use drugs to feel normal" apply if this were cancer?

/channel

Now, I get that this is a constant thing, not a specific acute illness...but I don't think that it's necessarily a bad thing to treat something that fucks up your life this much as an illness, even if it isn't technically one. (Or is it?) If you have asthma, you use an inhaler. Et cetera.

Now, I'm not saying that a hysterectomy isn't an option, and maybe that is what you and your doctor will decide is best for you. But you can't say "I don't want to have to use drugs to feel normal" and then not say "I don't want to have to remove a major bodily organ to feel normal." Or something. (Not sure how my negatives were in that sentence...)

Anyway, I'm sorry all this suckage is going on and good luck!

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

I totally get the Carolyn angle. I guess what I should've said is that I don't feel normal when I take drugs. It treats one symptom and leaves me with a whole mess of new ones. I'm not sure what the symptoms of not having a uterus are, besides the inability to contract the 18y9m STD, which I'm okay with.

[flamingophoenix.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the extra symptoms are sucky. :-(