The fuck?

[jianantonic]

I went on 4 dates with a guy I met on OKC. I wasn't sure I was looking to actually date anyone new, but I liked talking to him and figured it would be nice to get to know him. And it was. I enjoyed hanging out with him, a lot. Yesterday we just hung out and talked for several hours. I sent him a text last night telling him I had a nice time, and another today asking what he thought of my haircut. No reply. I didn't think it was that weird, because he's got a family and I figured he was just spending time with them and didn't have time to text me back. (I met his wife yesterday, also. She seemed really cool. They're poly, too, obv.)

Having not heard from him at all by the end of the day, I was a little concerned. I just tend to worry when I don't hear from people. So I checked his Facebook account just to make sure there was no message that he'd died tragically or anything.

He blocked me. I'm blocked.

WTF?

I can only speculate, but I'm guessing his wife wasn't cool with it and asked him to cut ties with me? It would have been nice to get a "sorry, bye" message, though. I guess this is what it feels like to be ghosted. Fuck. Well, anyone who would do that to me is not worth my sorrow, but it still sucks. I'm still hoping I'll get an explanation from him eventually, but I won't be holding my breath. See, this is why I make it a rule in my relationships not to date people who are new to polyamory. Too much drama. (I didn't realize until we had our long heart-to-heart yesterday just how new he and his wife were to it. Oh well.)

Toby got home from a trip tonight -- I hadn't seen him since before I left for New York. I'm really happy he's back. He's sleeping on my left arm right now. I'm a very lucky girl, despite how anyone else might treat me.

Comments

[istar.livejournal.com]

Uggghh, weird, that sucks. I think I'm still theoretically open to new-polys, but the combination of established relationship + new to poly = definitely not something i want to interfere with. Hugs and good energy to you and Toby.

[jianantonic.livejournal.com]

Thanks. He did reach out today to explain. His wife got spooked and requested they close the relationship again. She had blocked me on his phone and Facebook. I totally understand and told him to put his marriage first. I liked him, but I don't need to touch a relationship like that with a ten foot pole.